A Walk in the Woods

Yesterday, like many of our days, our family decided to head out into the cool mountain air and into the woods. We are fortunate to have access to the Blue Ridge Parkway and its many overlooks and hikes.

Nothing feeds my soul more than grounding in the joy that family creates. Having a tween and a toddler 8 years apart has given me a different perspective- I see that we are not just growing babies (that phase passes quickly). We are growing humans.

My first and last together.

Watching them “be” is most rewarding. Seeing them help each other out- gives me hope for times when I am no longer around. She’s kind. She’s gentle. She’s brave. She’s strong. He’s silly and loving. He’s adoring.

Off they go together. Up-up-up! Supporting and helping.

Trusting!

Knowing.

And laughing!

My little quartet: full of love, light, and awesome.

And gratitude.

Three Words

“Let me walk.”

Powerful little words mark an act of independence and a shift in the way we’ll be doing things. If you’re a parent of an older child, you know this moment, too. The endearing plea of “I want to hold you, Mommay” has been replaced with the much more commanding and spirited “let ME waaaaaaaaawlk.”

I lowered him onto the ground and off he went toward the FedEx truck. Several steps later, he stopped and turned to look for me. I was there, of course, with a bittersweet smile on my heart and a cheerful tone: “It’s alright- you can get closer.” As he got closer, the driver hopped back in the truck and drove away with a beepbeep of the horn for my little guy…. “Let’s follow him, Mommy.” I didn’t agree to follow the truck because I knew it’d be out of sight before we could get back to the car. He WAS walking after all.

As the truck drove away before we could catch up, so will my little beeper continue to grow until he’s out of sight and on his own. It’s happening with his sister.

“Let me walk.” It’s begun. My last baby and his little red shoes taking him wherever we go. I will rest assured knowing there will be times I’ll hold him on my left hip and carry him with arms flung around my neck. But, those moments will get farther apart until one day they’ll be gone. I don’t remember when this happened with my best girl. I didn’t know I needed to remember. So when she asks me to tuck her in or hold her hand, you better bet I will.

Three words: I love them.

Powerful words punctuating a mother’s life.

BeepBeep

The sights and sounds of our new neighborhood in Cary are quite different than the ones in our downtown Durham one. The roosters cock-a-doodle-dooing and cars clunking over the speedhump have been replaced with the beep-beeping and bang-banging of construction site sounds.
We set our little guy’s room up with boats and all things nautical when we moved in last May. But, it fell flat with him. Sometime in January, he started his obsession with trucks and construction equipment.
Toy trucks, dump trucks, cement trucks, backhoes, excavators, cranes, forklifts…. If you can name it, he’s seen it firsthand. From our daily walks passed construction sites on the way to the park to watching a house going up across the street while I made him breakfast and lunch, he’s become a little construction expert!

Watching him take in this wonderful world has opened a part of my soul I didn’t know existed. Hearing him wake up at night and call out “BeepBeep” instead of “Mommmmmmy” brings a smile to my heart as I roll over to go back to sleep. But nothing. I mean nothing could prepare me for the feeling I had when I saw his face the day we replaced his boats with beepbeeps a couple weeks ago:

I put him down; pulled back his woobie; and snapped the picture. He found his happy, and so did I. His jaw-dropping excitement reminded me to appreciate the joy in giving.
Here’s to you, LittleBeep. Mommy loves you very much. Thank you for the lesson.

Grateful

Today I am reminded to cherish the time we have with our children.

Last night, a fellow mom and friend had to make the horrifying decision to remove her son from life support. For her, there will be no more “morning moments”. The next couple of days will be a test of her strength and courage- saying goodbye to her child.

So I honor her by taking time to drink in the beauty and wonder of my own son….

Who knows what the divine plan is for this little fellow? Who knows how long we will have with him? Who knows which lives he will touch? But, for me, he is an angel on Earth. And, I am grateful.

Today is a good day for a miracle. In the words of this young man’s mother: “Let’s hope God’s will aligns with our own.”

Creating Magic

“Magic shows up when the horse knows his job, when we let go and allow them to be the best they can be. When we set the intention, give them just enough information so they know what to do next and then let go and let them show us how fantastic they are.”
I found this quote on the ThinLine blog a year or so ago. Horses teach us so many life lessons. The other day, I got an email from my daughter’s school about a dance club she and a classmate started. The first meeting had been a disaster!
As soon as I read it, that quote popped in my head. We had failed these children. In an effort to accommodate their excitement and leadership initiative, we did not slow down and set clear goals and intentions. The girls weren’t able to lead and show us their awesome. There were tears. Lots of tears.

How do we as parents know when we’ve given our children enough information to succeed? When things haven’t gone well, when do we step in and set them on a better course?

Borrowing from the wisdom behind that quote, I jumped in and set up a very basic plan with clear goals and steps. By scaffolding, my hope was to give them the necessary structure and information to grow from their experience and shine.

Now, I step back and let go. It’s up to them.

Here’s to creating magic.

Four Words

Bitten, kicked, and trampled three years ago. She had no permanent scars, but her ego was bruised and her fear was controlling her ability to enjoy her favorite activity.

A month ago, I took her out to my childhood barn, a kid-friendly and horsemanship barn, in search of confidence. Before her first lesson, I told her that we would go week-to-week. We would rate her confidence on a 1-10 scale. If she wanted to stop the lessons or if her comfort level was below 5, she could. But, this was her final opportunity to “earn her stirrups.”

The first three lessons went well; her confidence level was around 7-8. She was still afraid to pick her horse’s hooves. But, she had one lesson left and lots of determination.

Here she is beaming after her last lesson. She earned her stirrups!

She untacked Margo in record time. A few minutes later, she was helping a friend groom her pony. I peaked into the stall and congratulated them both. She struggled a couple times getting Tony’s hoof up. “It’s okay if you can’t get it, B. I’ve loved watching you have fun. You’ll get that hoof up sometime. I believe in you.”

I turned around to walk back to the car. My momtuition told me to turn backaround. And, I caught her:

SHE DID IT!!!! Tony pony’s hoof is up!

On our way home, I asked her how she did it. “You believed in me, Mom, and I knew I could.”

Thatwaseasy!

I think I will use those words more often.

Sunshine Smiles

“I cannot endure to waste anything so precious as autumnal sunshine by staying in the house.”—Nathaniel Hawthorne

It rained here for twelve straight days. Twelve. Straight. Days. Thankful for a dear friend and former neighbor for the inspiration to head outside on this sunny day. For us, that meant an early morning trike ride AND a post-nap park trip. What ever it means to you-enjoy the day.

May we all have sunshine smiles!

Live Your Awesome

When my daughter was 3-4, we started a tradition. Whenever I took her picture, I asked her to show me her best “awesome.” Boy have we seen some funny pictures! These snapshots are delightfully endearing and are fun to review. The other morning we were driving to school, and we had one of those moments- a mother/daughter one. She thanked *me* for teaching her to live her awesome. My heart is full. May we all live our awesome.